The M Word

Friends. Can we talk about something? If you know me, you know that I make every effort to be as transparent as possible. I am pretty much an open book. It's true. But I think there's certain stigmas around the female body, no? I know we're making leaps and bounds lately, but we still don't talk about things. Like Menopause. We all know about it, but we don't sit around the kitchen table and talk about the hot flashes, the anxiety, the insomnia. The weight gain. Oh the weight gain. And how that can all affect our health-our physical health, our mental health, and our emotional health. And we don't talk about the fact that some of us go through this transition in our 40's. We all expect it to be something that 'happens later', like in our 50's or something. But no one tells you it can start in your late 30's and take 10 years. That's right. 10 years. But I'm here now, going through it, and I want to talk about it.

In the beginning

I started seeing signs a few years ago. Heavier than normal periods. The occasional hot flash, mostly in the summer so it wasn't as noticeable. Then my periods started getting wonky. Every 3 months. Twice in one month. And now, nothing. I'll be honest. I like the 'no period' aspect of menopause. Because, umm, hello. 30+ years of dealing with this. I'm ready for a break. But I was in no way prepared for all the other side effects of menopause. And when they hit, you know they're there.

About two or three weeks ago I started noticing that I was getting intense hot flashes. Like intense. Sweat inducing hot flashes. Wake-up-in-the-middle-of-the-night-drenched-in-sweat hot flashes. Gross. And then you smell. Of course you smell. You're sweating like you just ran 3 miles. In the heat of summer. And the anxiety. Y'all. My normal state is to be anxious. If I keep someone waiting. Oh boy! I don't like it. But the anxiety of menopause? Ridiculous. I was sitting on the couch, watching TV, minding my own business when out of nowhere, bam! Anxiety inducing crying spell. What? I'm a crier. Always have been. Always will be. That's not unusual. I watch a TV commercial and can cry. So that's not a huge deal for me. But the anxiety that comes from nowhere and hits you hard. That's unusual.

So I knew it was time to address this thing that was happening to my body. I've gained weight this past year. I blame it on the pandemic and all that went with that. Some people were living their best life, making a living, getting in shape. Me? I was a bag o' nerves trying to navigate my fledging business and I gained weight. I don't know that I changed anything-eating habits, sugar intake. It just happened. I didn't exercise like I used to. That took a back seat. I get it. I'm not happy about it, but I get it. But then I started exercising. And watching what I eat. And I didn't lose anything. Nope. Not one pound. Then the anxiety and hot flashes and the insomnia settled in. And I started researching. And bingo! Menopause! That might not explain all the weight gain, but it makes sense in my head. And once I know what I'm up against, I can formulate a plan. And that's exactly what I did!

Formulating a plan

So. I'm not a person who runs to the doctor for everything. I mean, if I'm sick and I need a doctor of course I'll go. I'm prone to cellulitis. This happens when I get a blister and I don't take care of it. I've had it happen so many times that when I start seeing the telltale red streaks, I immediately get antibiotics. So. I'm not an eschewer of doctors. I'm an eschewer of chemicals and adding things unnecessarily to my body. I just try to do things more naturally. So I started doing research and discovered some things that could help.

But first, let's discuss those symptoms of menopause. Or at least the ones I've noticed. 1). Hot flashes. Sweat inducing, gross hot flashes. They hit you out of nowhere and then you get so cold. So you peel off layers to avoid the hotness and then you put on more layers because you're now freezing. Hot flashes are exacerbated by caffeine, alcohol. Guess who loves coffee and wine? I can give up alcohol, but I'm finding coffee to be harder. In fact, I'm sitting here with a cuppa as I type this out. 2) insomnia. Not the 'I can't fall asleep' kind of insomnia. Nope. The 'it's 3AM again and I cannot fall back asleep. And now my mind is racing with all the things I should have done. Or should have said. Or how am I going to make my business succeed?' At 3AM? You're not. You know what's going to help your business succeed? Getting some sleep. 3) Anxiety. I'm not sure I need to mention anything else about this. I think you get the point. 4) weight gain. Again. Do I need to say anything more? The weight gain can be centered around your abdomen (umm...hello there belly fat. Where'd you come from?) and therefore cause all kinds of other health issues. Diabetes? Check. Heart disease? double check. Osteoporosis? Double, Double check.

The plan

So in an effort to fight off the effects of menopause, I've formulated a plan, based on research-both reading books and perusing the internet.

1. Supplements: I've decided on the following supplements: calcium with Vit D, milk thistle, magnesium, vit B complex, and ashwagandha. I won't go into details since I'm not a medical professional. You should do what you are comfortable with. See a professional. Do your own research. Find a healer. What ever works best for you.
2. Exercise: I need to start this again. I feel better and I know that eventually it will help with my weight. So walking and then some gentle yoga. Strength training is recommended but I am not set up for that. So yoga will have to do. And I really like yoga. I just need to remember that it is going to take longer to lose the weight now.
3. Cut out the crap: You are what you eat, right? So I need to clean it up. I've been very busy lately and not meal planning. So I'll go back to that and I know it will help. I feel so much better when I eat right. And exercise
4. No more alcohol; decrease caffeine intake: I know I should give up coffee, at least for a little while. But I can't. I have started drinking more hot tea, but y'all. I love coffee. I've decreased my intake to one cup per day. And alcohol I'll gladly give up. I don't feel good drinking it any more. My body metabolizes it differently since I've entered perimenopause (I realize that now. I didn't at the time) and I don't want to wake up feeling bad anymore (even with just one drink, I feel horrible the next day). I have noticed that the hot flashes are not nearly as intense since I've decreased both of these things.
5. Hydrate: I don't drink enough water. Period. My body requires tons of water. It always has. And now I'm sweating like a fool and I'm not refilling it. Speaking of, you'd think I'd be losing tons of weight from how much I sweat. But. *shrugs shoulders*

That's it. That's my plan. I'll start working on the exercise, diet, and hydration end of things. I've already started the supplements and have noticed a small change. I know this is mostly something we just have to get through, but if I can help decrease some of the side effects, I'm all for it! And I just know that taking better care of myself is the best thing to do. It's amazing what a woman's body to go through and what all it can handle. And by taking really good care of ourselves, it can only get better.

Linking up for Farm Fresh Tuesdays and Party in Your PJs, because this is about as real and fresh as I can get. xoxo

'til next time
-k
xoxo